OF HORRENDOUS CRIMES CAN TAKE. ME. I STILL THINK IT, YOU KNOW, LIKE IT’S A DREAM MEAN LIKE SHE’S GOING TO WALK BACK IN THAT DOOR WHEN INDIVIDUALS ARRIVE AT A POINT THAT THEY DON’T HAVE HOPE TO GO ON OR THEY DON’T SEE THE MEANING OF GOING ON. THAT IS VERY CONCERNING BECAUSE SOMEBODY WHO DOESN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO LOSE IS MIGHT BE DOING ANYTHING. 1200 AMERICANS DIE FROM MURDER SUICIDES EACH YEAR, ACCORDING TO THE VIOLENCE POLICY CENTER. THAT’S 11 A WEEK ON THURSDAY IN OKLAHOMA CITY, FAMILY WAS KILLED BY THEIR FATHER, LEAVING MANY WONDERING WHAT DRIVES SOMEONE TO COMMIT SUCH A HORROR. OFTEN PARENTS, SPECIFICALLY MOMS, FEEL WHEN THEY KILL THEIR CHILDREN FIRST THEY HAVE FEELINGS LIKE, I DON’T WANT MY CHILDREN UNATTENDED. NOBODY’S GOING TO LOVE THEM. NOBODY’S GOING TO CARE FOR THEM. OHIO PSYCHIATRIST DR. BRITTA OSTERMEIER SAYS FATHERS DECISIONS ARE MORE LIKELY ROOTED IN RAGE. IF I’M NOT WANTED IN THAT FAMILY ANYMORE AND I HAVE TO LEAVE, I’M NOT GOING TO LEAVE THE CHILDREN TO YOU. IF I CAN’T HAVE THEM. WELL, YOU CAN’T HAVE THEM EITHER. NATHAN BREWER LOST HIS DAUGHTER, BRITTANY AND HENRIETTA. THIS MAY IN A FAMILY MURDER SUICIDE. A SLEEPOVER. SHE NEVER CAME HOME FROM. IT’S HARD FOR ME, BUT. BUT I KEEP TRYING TO STAY STRONG FOR OTHER PEOPLE, NATHAN SAYS HE ASKS HIMSELF THE SAME QUESTION NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AND I KEEP TRYING TO THINK, YOU KNOW, THE WHAT IF? WHAT IF I SAID NO? WHAT IF THIS? PSYCHOLOGISTS SAY FEELINGS OF GUILT AND BLAME ARE COMMON EMOTIONS FOR SURVIVING FAMILY MEMBERS. THEY SAY IT’S IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT AND TO REACH OUT FOR HELP. IT’
Father of victim in Henryetta murder-suicide talks coping with tragedy
Nathan Brewer, who lost his daughter, Brittany, in May to a murder-suicide in Henryetta, describes the grief that comes with loss.
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Updated: 6:30 PM CDT Aug 18, 2023
As Oklahomans continue to process the murder of a mother and her three children, one question still lingers: Why? On Wednesday, an Oklahoma City family was killed by their husband and father, leaving many wondering what drives someone to commit such a horror. The University of Oklahoma Psychiatrist Dr. Britta Ostermeyer said the killer's decisions were more than likely rooted in rage. | MORE | Mother of mass murder victim pleads for change as another tragedy strikes Oklahoma"'If I'm not wanted in that family anymore, and I have to leave, I'm not going to leave the children to you. If I can’t have them, you can’t have them either,'" Britta said. "Often, parents, specifically moms, feel when they kill their children, they have feelings like, ‘I don’t want to leave my children unattended. No one is going to love them. No one is going to care for them.'" Nathan Brewer lost his daughter, Brittany, in May to a murder-suicide in Henryetta. She went to a sleepover, and she never came home. “For me, I still think it’s a dream, like she’s going to walk back in that door," Brewer said. "It’s hard for me, but I keep trying to stay strong for other people." Brewer said he asks himself the same questions night after night. “I keep going over the what-ifs. ‘What if I said no? What if this?'" Brewer said. Psychiatrists said feelings of guilt and blame are common emotions for surviving family members. They said it is important to understand it's not their fault and to reach out for help. “It’s nobody's fault besides the perpetrator," Britta said. Top Headlines Police search for suspect who fled from traffic stop on I-40 and ran into wooded area Eastbound I-40 in Oklahoma City metro narrowed due to semi-trailer rollover 3 children, woman dead after suspected murder-suicide in OKC; suspect found with gunshot wound to head Travel goals: Triplets accomplish goal of seeing all 50 states by their 25th birthday
As Oklahomans continue to process the murder of a mother and her three children, one question still lingers: Why?
On Wednesday, an Oklahoma City family was killed by their husband and father, leaving many wondering what drives someone to commit such a horror. The University of Oklahoma Psychiatrist Dr. Britta Ostermeyer said the killer's decisions were more than likely rooted in rage.
| MORE | Mother of mass murder victim pleads for change as another tragedy strikes Oklahoma
"'If I'm not wanted in that family anymore, and I have to leave, I'm not going to leave the children to you. If I can’t have them, you can’t have them either,'" Britta said. "Often, parents, specifically moms, feel when they kill their children, they have feelings like, ‘I don’t want to leave my children unattended. No one is going to love them. No one is going to care for them.'"
Nathan Brewer lost his daughter, Brittany, in May to a murder-suicide in Henryetta. She went to a sleepover, and she never came home.
“For me, I still think it’s a dream, like she’s going to walk back in that door," Brewer said. "It’s hard for me, but I keep trying to stay strong for other people."
Brewer said he asks himself the same questions night after night.
“I keep going over the what-ifs. ‘What if I said no? What if this?'" Brewer said.
Psychiatrists said feelings of guilt and blame are common emotions for surviving family members. They said it is important to understand it's not their fault and to reach out for help.
“It’s nobody's fault besides the perpetrator," Britta said.
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